Close up of players of two sports teams shaking hands before the game on the field.

This one was so absurd it read like it happened in Connecticut. After all, a Glastonbury barbershop owner did sucker punch a Board of Education member in the face last December over restoring the Tomahawk mascot at the high school.

But, no, this happened in Tennessee. State Rep. Jeremy Faison got so heated during an argument with an official during his son’s high school basketball game in January that Faison tried to pull the guy’s pants down.

Yes, an elected state official tried to “pants” a ref.

So, no, there is no definitive answer to the question, “How low can we go?”

In February, the National Federation of State High School Associations decided to make sportsmanship the “No. 1 Point of Emphasis” in all sports for the 2022-2023 season.

NFHS chief executive director Karissa Niehoff, former head of the CIAC, put it out there because of concern unsporting behavior had increased in the past year. In what it called an urgent call for better conduct, the NFHS followed with a Sept. 1 release that its free sportsmanship course has been updated and available to students, coaches, parents, administrators, officials and performing arts educators.

Now let’s see what happens. There are so many streams of behavior related to sportsmanship and youth sports, it is a massive undertaking with deep roots.

In an attempt to improve fan behavior, the FCIAC recently announced it is invoking a “No Names, No Numbers” policy at its games. Students will not be allowed to say or chant and opponent’s name or jersey number during competition.

Let’s see how it goes. Perhaps the handpicked student leadership groups at each Fairfield County school can lead the way for parents and kids alike.

“The past year was brutal with the things that were being said,” FCIAC commissioner Dave Schulz told our Joe Morelli.

“Last year was the worst year I’ve ever had with fans. It’s not even close in all my years,” Stamford AD Chris Passamano said.

Their words scare me, because I believe Schulz and Passamano.

Through the COVID pandemic, we pined for sports. We talked how people figured to be more appreciative upon their return to the stands. How they’d be apt to enjoy the communal sports experience more wholesomely, with less rancor.

Decorum is lower than ever. Good manners are considered a weakness. A push has only one answer: a shove in return. We grow more coarse, more vulgar. We celebrate incivility “as telling it like it is.” Louts, boors, bullies are treated as royalty nowadays.

When I tweeted out Morelli’s story about the FCIAC initiative, back came this tweet: “They should also abolish keeping scoring and hand out participation ribbons after each game so everyone goes home happy.”

Think about that for a minute. The FCIAC folks are talking about getting tougher and enforcing rules of good-old fashioned behavior and they are met by people who equate it with getting soft, non-competitive and restraining free speech. Our thinking has become warped. What? We’ll become better Americans by encouraging vulgar talk on the field and in the stands?

We used to be able to discuss our differences. Now those who disagree with our points of view are enemies to be crushed. Tribalism has overwhelmed us. Combine that with immature 16-year-old boys — with a vulgar sense of humor empowered by a crowd setting — well, it has gotten bad.

“My little Johnny, called your kid the N-word? And threatened to kick his butt? And my kid got ejected from the stands? I can’t wait to sue the school district!”

Small wonder why there is such a shortage of officials. We used to mock European soccer fans as hooligans. Look in the mirror lately, America.

For years, I admit I was part of the kumbaya movement. Let’s teach the kids. When something goes wrong, let’s get the leaders of teams together over pizza and talk it out. Let’s appeal to the better angels of our parental nature. I’m big enough now to admit I’m an egghead with egg on my face. We don’t need less teaching. We need more punishment.

Pamphlets on sportsmanship are fine. So are the videos. So are talks from influential personalities. The kids need to hear what is right and what is wrong in school and at home and, if so inclined, in church. But so much of that also involves improving in the long run.

We need clear rules and more immediate results. We need more disciplinary measures. We need quicker ejections. If arrests are made, the courts shouldn’t be afraid to crack down. If someone is stupid enough to put young people in jeopardy, maybe a participation medal behind bars will smarten them up.

The assault case involving an adult and student at a girls hockey game this past season has been continued until Tuesday in Milford Superior Court. According to West Haven police an argument during the SCC girls ice hockey championship turned into a physical altercation. Christine Binkowski, wife of the Guilford coach, is alleged to have assaulted a West Haven High student and the student needed medical attention.

What if Binkowski is found guilty on charges of breach of peace and third-degree assault? In Connecticut, you can get up to 1 year in jail, a $2,000 fine for third-degree assault.

Sportsmanship? No. 1 Point of Emphasis by the national high schools?

The Tennessee lawmaker got off with a Twitter apology. In Manchester Superior Court, a Glastonbury barber and Board of Ed member won admission to a probation program that can lead to dismissal of their breach of peace charges. Let’s see what point of emphasis No. 1 means to a judge in Milford Superior Court?

Last school year in Connecticut was a continuing nightmare that turned tragic and unthinkable when a football player from a suburban Catholic school was charged with stabbing a football/lacrosse player from another suburban Catholic school after confrontations at two parties.

The list goes on from there and these are only the ones I know. In a lawsuit that is continuing in Hartford Superior Court, a Glastonbury woman alleged every time her son took the field for a junior varsity team, Staples players would make loud monkey noises. The Westport superintendent said there was no merit to the allegations.

The Region 10 superintendent wrote a letter of apology for fans’ profanity and racist words directed toward the Platt girls basketball team during a game at Lewis Mills.

A Wheeler senior baseball player was suspended two games after he allegedly said the N-word to a freshman teammate.

Backed by a couple of witnesses, a Montville cheerleader said she was spat on and called a racial slur by East Catholic students. East Catholic apologized to those who may have had a negative experience, but said an investigation showed no evidence the racial slur occurred.

Bacon Academy adult fans allegedly taunted Ledyard players at a girls basketball game. Police arrived. An adult spectator was escorted from the game. A Ledyard player said she and her teammates were called the N-word multiple times. The Colchester superintendent apologized, but Colchester’s First Selectman said the Ledyard superintendent should resign unless he could prove the alleged incident occurred.

That’s the game now. If it’s not on video, doubt is immediately cast. Too few people want the trouble. Too few people want law enforcement or the courts involved. Even fewer want to take the accountability.

I spent some time in the spring looking into a situation with U-11 girls soccer team from the Old Greenwich-Riverside Community Center. A CT Cup game was terminated by the referee evidently because of alleged verbal abusiveness by Farmington fans toward the OGRCC girls and the referee. The OGRCC parents were given the option to replay the game against the same team where there had been problems or withdraw from the CT Cup. They withdrew.

I repeatedly called the Connecticut Junior Soccer Association and CT Cup officials for an explanation. I left telephone messages and emails.

This is no longer a plea for sportsmanship.

With high school sports beginning again this week, it is a demand to enforce it and to be accountable.

jeff.jacobs@hearstmediact.com; @jeffjacobs123

Jeff Jacobs is a 10-time Connecticut Sports Writer of the Year and four times has been honored by the Associated Press Sports Editors as one of the top 10 columnists in the country. Jeff's passion for local sports runs the gamut from high school athletics to UConn basketball - he has covered all four UConn men's championships and 10 of the 11 women's titles. He's also covered multiple Olympics, World Series and Super Bowls. Along the way, he has demonstrated a zeal for the big scoop and a finely honed ability to convey essential human tales that resonate far beyond the sports world.